Thoughts on Taxes for 2014

2013 has been a big year for taxes. The "fiscal cliff" deal boosted the top federal income tax rate to 39.6%; "Obamacare" added new taxes on top earners; and dozens of state and local governments raised their taxes, too. Congress will finish 2013 even more divided than it began, which will probably protect us from new taxes next year. But here are some quotes to ease the sting of this year's higher bills:

"[A tax loophole is] something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is tax reform."
Sen. Russell B. Long (D-LA)

"The Eiffel Tower is the Empire State Building after taxes."
Anonymous

"Our party has been accused of fooling the public by calling tax increases 'revenue enhancement.' Not so. No one was fooled."
Dan Quayle

"When we played, World Series checks meant something. Now all they do is screw up your taxes."
Hall of Fame pitcher Don Drysdale

"When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin."
Mae West

"The question is: What can we, as citizens, do to reform our tax system? As you know, under our three-branch system of government, the tax laws are created by: Satan. But he works through the Congress, so that’s where we must focus our efforts."
Dave Barry

"Late one night, just blocks from the Capitol, a mugger jumped into the path of a well-dressed fellow and stuck a gun in his ribs. 'Give me your money,' the thief demanded. 'Are you kidding?' the man said. 'I’m a U.S. congressman.' 'In that case,' the mugger growled, cocking his weapon, 'give me my money.'"
Playboy Magazine

"A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul."
George Bernard Shaw

On a more serious note, we wish you all the best this holiday season, and we look forward to serving all your tax-planning needs in 2014!

The Naughty List

Christmas is almost here, and that means millions of parents across America are telling their kids to behave themselves or risk winding up on the "Naughty List." (Admit it — if you've got kids, and you celebrate Christmas, you've done it yourself.) But while kids may be on their best behavior, grownups sometimes fail to make the connection between their own behavior and what Santa leaves under the tree. This is especially true when it comes to taxes! Misbehave there, and you risk a lot more than a lump of coal. So here are four cautionary tales to consider as the holiday approaches.

• Joel Grasman worked as an electrician for the Metropolitan Transit Authority in Long Island. He and his wife owed the IRS $10,000 in tax for failing to report a loan from her pension. So, late one night, Grasman snuck into the yard where he works to steal some welding machines to pay off that debt. He loaded the machines onto his truck just fine, but forgot to lower the long boom on the truck before driving off to store the machines at his brother's garage. Uh oh. “I wanted to get out of there before I attracted any attention and I forgot to put the boom down,” he told the New York Post. “I started driving and then I started to see sparks of light in the sky.” Turns out he had taken down a bunch of power lines, causing an estimated $2-3 million in damages, and leaving 6,100 people without power for their Christmas lights and blinking yard Santas.
  
• Yetunde Oseni was a 37-year-old secretary working for the IRS in Maryland. Like many of us, Oseni loved shopping online, especially on Amazon.com. From 2009-2013, she stuffed her stockings with $8,515 worth of treats, including a chocolate fondue fountain, Bollywood movies, Pampers, Harlequin romance novels, Omaha Steaks, Apple Bottoms skinny jeans, mango body wash, and even a Ginsu knife set. She might still be enjoying her presents now if she had used her own credit card to pay for them. But the IRS gave her a CitiBank MasterCard to pay for office supplies, and it must have been just too tempting. Now she's looking at ten years in a cheerless gray room with no space for any of those goodies. Treasury scrooges say she may have even used her IRS computer to fake the receipts she submitted to cover up her purchases!
• Walter Trizila is a more loyal employee than Joel Grasman or Yetunde Oseni — but can he make the "Nice List"? Last November, IRS officers showed up to seize a dump truck from his employer. Trizila climbed into a front-end loader, scooped up a load of dirt, drove it towards the officers, and dumped the dirt at their feet. After pleading guilty to a misdemeanor charge of assault, he accepted three years probation — and promised to attend anger management class.
• Robert Fernandes got a great deal on a foreclosed house in Forks Township, Pennsylvania. But his wife homeschools their three kids, so he's not a fan of the school district tax. Now, you or I might just concede the value in having good public schools, even if we don't have kids using them. But not Fernandes! No, rather than just grumble privately and write the check, he marched to his local tax collectors with a stack of 7,144 dollar bills. He even brought a friend with a camera to document his stunt on YouTube (Preview) . Fernandes may not have actually broken the law here, but he's still probably going to find himself on the naughty list. (He may have realized it, too, since he brought doughnuts for the county clerk's office!)

Here's the saddest part about all these stories. You don't have to risk finding a lump of coal in your stocking to pay less tax. You just need a plan. And yes, Virginia, there is still time to treat yourself to savings before 2013 runs out. So call us before Santa loads up his sleigh to stuff your stockings with savings to last a year.

"Ardente!" is Portuguese for "Hot!"

Tax collectors generally don't choose their line of work for the pay. Glassdoor.com, a gossipy website covering salaries and careers, reports the average Revenue Agent earns $73,967. Careerbliss.com tells us the average criminal investigator earns $99,000 — which makes sense considering there's at least a chance they get shot at while working. That's not bad coin . . . but it's hardly enough to party with the rich and famous.

But what's true here in the United States may not be true in the rest of the world. Our neighbors to the south in Brazil have been transfixed lately by a sordid scandal of glitz and bling featuring — you guessed it — a gang of tax collectors, accused of helping construction companies evade over $200 million in taxes.

Our story starts, as so many tawdry stories do, with a woman scorned. Luis Alexandre Cardoso de Magalhaes met his former girlfriend, Vanessa Alcantara, at a sleazy nightclub. (She says they met when she tried to sell him a cellphone plan.) Magalhaes worked as a tax inspector for the city of Sao Paolo, earning $82,000 to oversee the city's "Imposto sobre Servicos," or service tax. He was also, it turns out, working with three other officials to help developers evade the tax. The builders delivered bags of cash with up to $30,000 every week to his office. Magalhaes would spirit the cash out of the building, and he and Alcantara would count it and divvy it up together in her living room.

And what did our young lovers do with their ill-gotten gains? Secure their retirement with a portfolio of carefully diversified mutual funds and prudently-laddered municipal bonds? (That wouldn't make much of a story, would it?) No — they blew the loot on $500 boxes of Cuban cigars, $2,260 bottles of wine, a Porsche Cayenne, and private plane rides to resorts on Angra dos Reis, an island off the coast. The couple dropped $50,000 to decorate Alcantara's apartment and splurged on $2,200 hotel suites. Magalhaes also showered up to $4,500 a night on a cavalcade of young women who valued their cash flow more than their virtue.

The party came to an end, as all parties must, when Magalhaes and Alcantara separated after giving birth to a son, and Alcantara became enraged at what she saw as a meager monthly child support offer. She sold him out to city prosecutors, and the story went straight to the tabloids. The case has even produced two brand-new celebrities — Magalhaes's new girlfriend, Nagila Coelho, a personal trainer who plans to start her own line of bikinis, and Alcantara herself, who plans to run for office. Her proposed slogan? "Being a thief is easy; I'll be honest among the thieves."

We understand that you want to pay less tax, too. But we know you're not willing to risk scandal to do it. So we give you a plan to pay less, legally. Everything we do is court-tested and IRS-approved. The best part is, there's still time to act before 2013 draws to a close. So call us now for the plan you need!

Coach's Challenge

December is here, and for millions of college football fans, that means following their favorite coach to a New Year's bowl game. In Tuscaloosa, Alabama's Nick Saban is reeling from the Crimson Tide's last-second loss to arch rival Auburn in this year's "Iron Bowl." In Columbus, Ohio State's Urban Meyer is celebrating 24 straight victories after his Buckeyes beat Michigan by just one point in "The Game." And further west, Washington's Steve Sarkisian is celebrating his Huskies win over the Washington State Cougars in the 106th "Apple Cup."

As always, these coaches and dozens more will be paying attention to the latest Bowl Championship Series standings. But this year, they'll also be paying attention to the IRS. That's because a new strategy might help them block taxes when they switch jobs.

College football coaches can make a lot of money. Alabama's Saban will make at least $5.65 million this year, and 51 coaches make more than the average pro player ($1.9 million). In 27 states, the highest-paid public employee is a football coach. Naturally, that means they pay a lot of tax. So this is more than just an academic discussion — there's a lot of money at stake.

Let's take a closer look here. Butch Jones led the University of Cincinnati Bearcats to a 23-14 record before the University of Tennessee hired him away to coach the Volunteers. As part of Jones' new deal, Tennessee paid $1.4 million to buy out his contract with Cincinnati. The Bearcats, in turned, poached Tommy Tuberville away from Texas Tech — and as part of that deal, paid $943,000 to buy out Tuberville's old contract with the Red Raiders. (Why not? They can take it from the $1.4 million they're getting from Tennessee, and still have enough left over to pay an assistant or two!)

Now, traditionally, those payments Tennessee and Cincinnati made to buy out their new coaches' obligations under their old contracts have been considered additional income to the coaches, and thus taxable to them. "What's the big deal?" you might ask. "So Tuberville recognizes $943,000 in extra income. Can't he just deduct that same amount as an employee business expense and zero out the income?" Well, yes . . . but. First, employee business expenses are a miscellaneous itemized deduction, subject to a 2% floor. (That means Tuberville gets no deduction for the amount equal to the first 2% of his adjusted gross income.) That alone would make over $60,000 of Tuberville's payment nondeductible. Second, and even worse, employee business expenses are a preference item for the dreaded Alternative Minimum Tax, which could wipe out the deduction entirely!

Back in 2007, two law school professors argued that the buyout should be treated as a nontaxable business obligation. They reached that conclusion on two grounds: 1) the school's reimbursement actually converts the coach's payment into a nonitemized deduction, which avoids the 2% floor and AMT; and 2) the payment is made for the school's benefit and not as compensation for the coach. Schools have taken notice, and both Tennessee and Cincinnati worded their new coaches' contracts to take advantage of this interpretation. As coaches' salaries and their corresponding buyout obligations go up, we should see more and more of these changes.

We realize most of you won't ever tackle these sorts of seven-figure challenges. But you still need a strong defensive line when you suit up against the IRS. That's where we come in. We give you the plan you need to keep the tax man out of your endzone. But time really is running out to save tax this season. So call us, now, before the IRS runs out the clock!